In an alternate universe…

President George W. Bush, at the recent dedication of the St. Mary and Jane House – a faith-based center for herbal therapy:

“Well, it’s an unimaginable honor to be the President during this time of this country. It means what these words say, for starters. The great inalienable rights of our country. We’re blessed with such values in America. And I–it’s–I’m a proud man to be the nation based upon such wonderful values.
Terrorists tried to take away those values. But as a nation, we stood up to them. We went after their basis of operations, and we went after their funding. Terrorists tried to use the profits from the illegal drug trade. They misunderestimated me. With one act, I eliminated a lot of the illegal profits by legalizing marijuana.
America is a nation that suffers from incredible disease. Marijuana can help here, too. Because when you feel better, you don’t need to go to the doctor as often. And make no mistake about it, this makes you feel better. That saves the taxpayers money.
Marijuana, or Hemp, as I sometimes call it, is also good for trade because of all the things you can make with it. It’s very important for folks to understand that when there’s more trade, there’s more commerce.
Hemp is hemispheric, too. I like to call it hemispheric in nature because it is a product that we can find in our neighborhoods. I know the human being and hemp can coexist peacefully.
You know, this issue seems to resignate with the people, and that matters to me, because I stand for doing what’s the right thing, and what the right thing is hearing the voices of people who use marijuana.
Marijuana is where our nation finds hope, where wings take dream.”