The legalization of meat – an allegory

Someone approached me with a question:

We already have two legal meats in this country, beef and pork. And these have caused all sorts of problems with cholesterol, heart attacks and obesity. People like them too much, so we’ll probably never be able to get rid of them, but why should we add another dangerous meat, by legalizing chicken?

And so I answered:

1. This is a free country and you don’t get to decide that people in power like pork so it’s OK, but I can’t be allowed to like chicken. You can (and should) inform me of the real dangers involved in any of the meats and encourage me to consume them responsibly, but you can’t sit there swallowing sausage and send me to jail for my chicken breast.
2. Chicken is actually better for you than beef and pork in many ways. Legal chicken could mean that some people will occasionally eat chicken instead of beef. And that’s a good thing. Imagine if, when you went to Wendy’s, instead of just having hamburgers, you could instead get a grilled chicken sandwich or chicken nuggets. How is that a bad thing?
3. Chicken has a whole range of nutritional and health benefits.
4. Making chicken illegal has not stopped people from eating meat (or even eating chicken). And it’s caused a host of other problems.
5. You’re a moron.